A long run at a conversational pace with my friends was just what my brain and body needed. 16 miles @ 7:48 pace to finish off the week!
A highlight of our Saturday was going out with Brooke’s grandparents and celebrating her birthday.
PF Changs for the first time in a very long time and it was delicious.
Beck even approved.
A highlight from Sunday was driving up into the mountains and exploring a little bit.
He has no fear (unless there is a butterfly;)
Love the weekends we are all together.
And then our one hour drive back home to a family birthday party for Brooke, turned into a 4 hour drive because of canyon closures and pushing the party back.
FYI, my #1 favorite tinted moisturizer is on sale today! You can use code WELCOME30 for $30 off $60+ orders! It gives the softest glow and feels so light on my skin.
It’s time for another Q&A post! You can find the first round here.
*How many days a week do you find yourself running alone vs with a group?
-At home, 99% of my mileage is with a group or Andrew. When I am traveling, it just depends if Andrew can come with me or if I’m in a place where I already have running friends, like St. George. I prefer running with people but a solo run every now and then feels so good, too.
*Tips for becoming a stepmom to a 10 yo girl?
-Let her lead… I had a therapist tell me to let them take the lead. You love them fiercely but have them decide how quickly they want to let you in, and what they really need you for! Be there for them. You will feel like you don’t belong at times or that you are just this extra random person (I did in the beginning) but remind yourself that it is about them, not us and what our ‘title’ is in the situation. The more people there are in the child’s life to love them for exactly who they are, the better. I can’t imagine my life without Knox. He makes everything better and being there for him through it all feels like I hit the jackpot. He told me the other day he wants to have our own book club so we will be going to be discussing our book soon over a large pepperoni pizza together. Have your own special traditions you do together, it is so fun.
*Would you ever consider writing a book about your personal life and experiences?
-I did one time! An ebook, but then I decided not to do anything with it. Writing it was a huge help for me in processing my feelings and I’m thankful that I did write it but so much of my story involves other people and I don’t find it fair to just share my side and my perception of the situation… and really, I have such good relationships now that I am very thankful I kept it locked up. There were a lot of tears on my keyboard, I had to buy a new one because it started malfunctioning. I LOVE reading memoirs… I think they are my favorite genre BUT, I always wonder how fair they are because we each perceive situations so differently, and what if we are wrong?!
*How do you feel about being a blended family?
-Ready for a novel? I can’t believe how seamless it is but also how hard it is. The six of us feel like a completely normal family. We mesh so well together, love each other 100% regardless of the step/half-siblings situation, and have the best time when we are all together. When we have everyone it feels like heaven. But. I would never have imagined how hard it would be too. Having Skye miss Brooke so much when she is with her dad or when Beck says, “I wish Knoxie boy was here” a million times a day when he is gone or planning a holiday with the big kids gone or figuring out summer schedules or dropping Brooke off at the airport… It is really hard. Oh, and the lack of control I felt in those first years as a complete control freak crushed me (thank you, Jenn, the best therapist ever for your help on this topic). We are beyond blessed in so many ways but Andrew and I always say that dealing with it all is our biggest trial. Life is meant to be a rollercoaster and the highs are SO worth the lows. We wouldn’t know the highs without the lows and I think about that often when my heart is aching to be all together.
*Not a q, just really sorry about your dad.
-Thank you so much. We are so lucky he is still here with us but he has some really hard days.
*Next on your travel bucket list?
-Our dream trip is to take the family and go visit my friend, Sarah and her family in Switzerland (remember, the friend I visited in Thailand and also went to London with?)! We would love to time it with the Tour de France while we would be over there, too!
*I’m curious after a failed marriage, how you got married so quickly after meeting Andrew!
-Me too hahah! This was not the norm for me (my first time I dated for MUCH longer). After my divorce, my mom called me the most efficient dater ever… but really, I could not get myself to get too serious with anyone. I would run away as fast as I could if it felt like there were chances of future talk. I can’t really explain it, but I opened that front door for my blind date with Andrew, and I felt so at home when I met him. Like my entire body relaxed from feeling as tense as possible for so long. It felt like we were just made for each other. We knew quickly we were going to get married and originally planned a 5 month engagement, but then it felt silly to wait any longer when, we knew already so we moved it up. We wanted to start our family! Also, did I ever tell you I was able to go into it all knowing I could trust him? One of my best friends knew him well (she wasn’t the one who set us up) and vouched 100% for how great he was. It was so nice to go into it trusting him and seeing his relationship with Knox and how he was with Brooke before getting married. I told my kids they aren’t allowed to do the same thing we did, though, haha.
*Rose and thorn of your trip to Croatia?
-Thorn: Andrew and I were eating lunch before our flight took off to Croatia, and I started sobbing right there in the restaurant. I was having so much anxiety about leaving the kids and told Andrew I wasn’t going anymore. All I could think of was worst-case scenarios that I was positive would happen. When I get like this, I can’t think logically, and I swear it isn’t anxiety, and it’s actually mom’s intuition telling me something terrible is going to happen. Luckily, Andrew dealt with this a few times with me and reminded me of the other times I felt this way and the kids were okay. He reminds me how good it is for them to see their parents adventuring together and for them to build relationships with other family members, too. I just needed a good cry and a reminder, and I felt so much better. Rose: our first sunset in Dubrovnik. I couldn’t believe how spectacular it was. Croatia exceeded every possible expectation we had.
*If you couldn’t run, what would be your go to hobby or exercise?
-Biking… I would probably get back into teaching spin classes again and long bike rides or races. And hobby… I would probably spend more time reading. I could see me setting my alarm for the same time I go out for runs and reading in bed instead.
*Would it be safe to drive from Venice to Dubrovnik solo?
-ABSOLUTELY. I felt so safe in Croatia! Just follow the usual safety needs such as not driving through the night and taking breaks often!
*Do you ever get injured?
-Knock on wood, but not anymore. Back in the day, I had every injury possible. IT Band, stress fractures, knee problems, hip problems, pelvis problems (running too soon after having Brooke), and I’m sure there were more that I’ve blanked on. After Beck, my plantar fasciitis got really bad, which I guess can be common in newly postpartum women. I wrote a post here about how I got over my plantar. Other than that, it’s been a while since I had a significant injury. The key for me and injury prevention was figuring out how to fuel myself and recover. My worst injuries were when I didn’t have a period due to overtraining and under-fueling. I’m pretty careful now to take time off if I am feeling something bubbling up, and I do strength training at least once a week now. I have also found that trail running really helps me to avoid injuries when I am marathon training because variation is key in terms of avoiding overuse injuries. As I get closer to 40 and older, cross-training will be more and more a part of my running training. Even for this marathon, I don’t plan on going nearly as high as normal in mileage and biking more to make up for those missed miles. I want to do this forever so I have to be smart.
*What are some tips to staying so positive? You are so positive and see the best in everything!
-I have found the biggest way to stay positive in today’s world (with so much craziness happening), is to get outside and talk to people in your community. Whether it’s a neighbor, a grocery store attendant, a teacher, a person out for a walk in your area… It reminds me how beautiful this world is and how good people truly are. The news (and social media can too at times) can be such a depressing representation of humanity and the state of the world but conversations with direct eye contact remind me that we are all so different and similar at the same time. People are so good.
I struggle with negative thoughts often (don’t we all?!) but my favorite way to get rid of those is to tell myself that they don’t get free rent in my headspace. If I look at my brain like an apartment building with different tennants, I would never allow someone to live there that trashes the apartment building. Why would I give space in my brain to thoughts that are going to ruin my space and perspective? I do vent often to Andrew and my running friends (sorry guys!) and then try to move on though. We need to talk about things and get them out and a good cry makes it so that I can be positive again. Anxiety does get the best of me at times and it is probably why I love running so much because it really takes the edge off.
*Have any of your kids been picky eaters? If so, how have you handled it?
-We’ve had one picky eater and it stressed me out big time in the beginning. And then, after talking to a million moms about it, they told me that they will grow out of it. We required a few bites of whatever we were having for dinner and then had things they would eat too but let it go. And guess what, they grew out of it and now eat everything under the sun!
Any questions for the next Q & A?
Any answers to any of these questions?
What is your run today?
Tell me a highlight and a lowlight from your weekend!
